On Pornography

Where to begin. I'll speak first to the young readers, because they're the most inexperienced and thus the most in need of guidance. But some of these topics are taboo, and I fear lots of folks haven't gotten guidance of this type well into their adulthood.

• Porn is not sex. Porn is not even really like sex. You shouldn't copy what you see in porn, and you should do your best to remember that any potential partners you interact with aren't going to be picture-perfect like some of the edited videos you're used to. They are real humans, who do not exist for your sexual pleasure. You are a real human, who does not exist for anyone else's sexual pleasure.
• Porn propagates unhealthy images of sexuality, women, gender identities, minorities, misogyny, motherhood, family, ...
• Porn is the commodification of sex, and it's dangerously addictive (especially in times when people are lonely and isolated, especially in times when dating is at low points due to lack of access [ie. people are busy and also don't have money and also often live with their parents till later] and the commodification of dating [ie. apps that can exacerbate gender tensions and unhealthy gender dynamics; apps that cause people to question their worth and their options])
• The instant access to an infinite amount of sexual commodification is dangerous to consumers. Porn consumption makes people hypersexual. It makes men get erectile dysfunction at increasingly young ages. It makes people dissatisfied with their real sexual relationships, in favor of internet images.
• It is much more dangerous to those involved in sex work. From young girls being trafficked into prostitution and for the production of pornography, to prostitutes who deal with violent clients, to women who are being forced to produce OnlyFans videos by their partner or pimp. These are (many of) the exploited people (predominantly women and girls, but men and boys as well) who generate the body of images and videos utilized for pornography. These are the people I am speaking for, first and foremost.

Very succinctly:

1. My first point is a message of solidarity to the victims of sexual trafficking and unwanted sex work. Whether forced into sexual labor through physically violent means or through economically violent conditions, my thoughts are first and foremost with those who are unwillingly part of the sex trade.
2. To those who are trapped, I know there are people and organizations fighting to provide resources for people like you. From housing to protection to economic assistance to educational assistance, I would like for you to find help. This is the main purpose here.
3. Taking these people into account, I'll say that the production of pornography in the modern era provides the broad acceptance of sexual violence. Is that always the case? Maybe not. But while there are economic and human incentives as currently laid out, while human trafficking and sexual tourism are well-known and socially-acceptable concepts, the pornographic media produced packages and preserves the sexual violence associated with its production.
4. ie. consumers of pornography are (often) watching children and teenagers being raped. they are often watching young women be pimped and prostituted against their will, for the sexual pleasure and economic gain of others.
5. Much like racism was used to justify slavery, misogyny and sexism are used to justify pornography; the industry propagates these ideals. The economic base (ie. coerced sexual labor) shapes and maintains the superstructure (ie. patriarchal ideology) - and the ideology also helps maintain the economic base.
6. The increasing access to pornography (prevalence of internet-access devices, at younger and younger ages) is causing people (especially boys and young men) to develop unhealthy images of sexuality, relationships, women, and gender/racial minorities. It is extraordinarily dangerous media to consume.
7. The logical follow-up to these points is that you should be doing what you can to stop the consumption of porn (your own, first; then by your friends, and family, and the kids who get iPads before elementary school). You should be thinking about how to stop the trafficking of girls into the sex trade, and you should be thinking about how to destroy an industry that will continue to negatively materially impact women's lives. Building towards gender equality means eradicating the unhealthy notions propagated in porn, because it means eradicating the commonplace sexual violence women face in all facets of life.

In the words of Emma Lazarus, "Until we are all free, we are none of us free."

All that said:

• Sexuality is natural.
• Sex is a normal thing. Masturbation is healthy.
• Exposure to naked people, kissing, sex at relatively young ages is healthy (in healthy contexts).
• Some amount of natural exposure to porn in the past (eg. stumbling upon an old nude pinup photo in the woods) was probably somewhat acceptable. Looking through a saucy SEARS catalog was probably a good thing to do at 9 years old, as was holding hands with the people I liked. But there's a line that's been crossed, with the advent of technology and the progression of the porn industry. With all social media, the lines between real life and carefully crafted image is blurred. The lines between streaming in hot tubs on Twitch and going on TikTok live in a bikini and whatever technical definition of "porn" you have are becoming increasingly hazy as well. Droves of pornographic content is available on platforms that are commonly accessible by children, not to mention the open internet.
• Historically taboo topics must be broached with honesty and transparency in order to dispel outdated notions and ideals. We must be talking about this stuff, often and loudly, in order to help people understand the dangers of a widely-accepted, corporate-backed industry that's dangerous for everyone involved.
• You should talk to your friends about how to establish healthy friendships and partnerships. You should establish healthy support systems for yourself and for your friends.
• Talking about it more will allow you to make sure your friends are safe and doing well, and it'll give you more perspectives into how relationships should (and shouldn't) work.
• Being communicative with your partner (or potential partners) is the best way to ensure you're on the same page as them. Being communicative with your friends is the best way to ensure you're going through regular experiences and handling them in the best way possible for all the parties involved.
• Relationships (and time alone) are both learning experiences. You can learn a lot about people in any relationship. You can see how they think and what they care about and how they do things. You can emulate their strengths when you notice them; you can strive to avoid their weaknesses, when you notice something about them bothering you. You should be building yourself up through the relationship, and you should be helping your friends and partners do the same. Cover their weaknesses, maybe they'll learn how to cover yours.
• Keep learning from all the people and relationships in your life. Keep building new ones. Keep working hard. Eventually, you'll be the person you want to be - and you'll be confident and ready in all your relationships then.

"SWERF"

• I'd like to make it clear that I am first and foremost siding with those who are forced into sex work, and am trying to show solidarity with the most oppressed class here.
• Though I'm against the current sex industry in practice because I think it leads to a harmful reproduction of patriarchal ideals and violence against women, I do understand that many people are involved with the sex industry and would stand to lose their source of income without the industry.
• To those people: I would like to provide access to resources (education, monetary, etc.) in order to better cater to your needs as people. My goal is to provide access to these resources across the globe, at a societal level, so that no women are forced into the sex industry against their will. I'm not a "sex-worker exclusionary radical feminist" - I'd like for everyone, including sex workers, to be able to survive without having to turn to sex work.
• Though my long term goal is to squash an incredibly harmful industry that harms many people, my goal in the short term is shared with you: I'd like for your life to be as survivable as possible, and I hope you're doing ok. I really am on your side, whether you're willing to hear me out or not.

As Rituraj (@ItinerantMedic) says on twitter:

Mainstream porn is the graphic, sexualised depiction of male dominance and female subordination. It eroticises male aggression towards women. It is hate speech, anti-woman propaganda and sexual terrorism against women.

It dehumanises women as sexual objects existing wholly for men’s sexual use and abuse. Porn is completely at odds with women’s dignity, humanity and equality.

A 2010 content analysis of popular porn videos found that 88.2% of scenes contained physical aggression, and that perpetrators were usually male and the targets of their aggression overwhelmingly female. Dr Michael Flood describes porn as “rape training”.

Research has also found pornography consumption is statistically significantly correlated with physical abuse (both victimisation and perpetration), sexual abuse (both victimisation and perpetration), acceptance of rape myths and negative gender equitable attitudes.

Porn is also a significant contributor to intimate partner sexual violence and abuse. New research has found that pornography features prominently in accounts of women who have experienced Intimate Partner Sexual Violence.

While some dismiss porn as “just a fantasy”, in reality, it is the filmed abuse, violation and degradation of actual human women. For the women being brutalised on camera, it is real.

A pornographic scene featuring a man choking a woman cannot be produced without an actual woman being choked, for the enjoyment of (mostly male) viewers. When acts of sexual violence, humiliation and cruelty are carried out by men on the bodies of women, this is not fantasy

So, we must disagree – yes, the problem is with pornography itself. It is not merely that boys are seeing it too young, or that it needs to be balanced with less violent and misogynistic representations of sexuality.

We can’t achieve gender equality without challenging pornography and its messages. Read [Caitlin Roper's response to Chanel Contos, entitled 'Yes the problem is porn'] at: Collective Shout

In the words of Star Plátano (@Qban_Linx) here,

[Porn] is a garbage industry whose distribution platforms are run by some of the worst people on the planet, completely unaccountable to the public (partially because most people don't even know their names), and the product has deeply warped people's perception of sex and intimacy.

That's not me being a prude, that's just a straightforward cost-benefit analysis.

One interesting article I read, with regards to sexuality in media, is Everyone is Beautiful and No One is Horny: Modern Action and Superhero Films Fetishize the Body, Even as they Desexualize it. by RS Benedict.

TODO: citations

TODO: brigid, etc - accts that helped

TODO: Dworkin, MacKinnon, etc. link Feminism

index tags: Feminism, Communists, Marxist Feminism, LGBTQ+, Health(care), Trans Rights, Pornography, Prostitution, Catharine A. MacKinnon, Sexuality, Sex, Masturbation, Communication, Relationships, Emma Lazarus, Yes the problem is porn: A response to Chanel Contos, Caitlin Roper, @ItinerantMedic, @Qban_Linx, Everyone is Beautiful and No One is Horny, RS Benedict

category tags: Personal Writings, Tweets